Obituaries

Jean Penney
B: 1946-04-22
D: 2019-07-31
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Penney, Jean
Richard Ellis
B: 1942-03-14
D: 2019-07-24
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Ellis, Richard
Shirley Alley
B: 1944-12-29
D: 2019-07-09
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Alley, Shirley
Winnifred Anderson
B: 1930-10-16
D: 2019-07-08
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Anderson, Winnifred
Carolyn Scripture
B: 1946-04-17
D: 2019-07-06
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Scripture, Carolyn
Angus Brasslett
B: 1947-10-15
D: 2019-07-02
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Brasslett, Angus
Bernice Turcotte
B: 1937-08-20
D: 2019-06-12
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Turcotte, Bernice
Michael Martin
B: 1954-02-07
D: 2019-06-11
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Martin, Michael
James Bair
B: 1934-10-13
D: 2019-06-09
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Bair, James
Jean Sturtevant
B: 1939-01-11
D: 2019-05-22
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Sturtevant, Jean
Ellen Mallar
B: 1944-07-04
D: 2019-05-21
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Mallar, Ellen
Daniel Clark
B: 1979-03-28
D: 2019-05-03
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Clark, Daniel
Krista Lizak
B: 1971-04-20
D: 2019-04-30
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Lizak, Krista
Kevin Cuddy
B: 1944-04-25
D: 2019-04-23
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Cuddy, Kevin
James Kernan
B: 1962-09-03
D: 2019-04-18
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Kernan, James
LeRoy Dubay
B: 1945-05-18
D: 2019-04-01
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Dubay, LeRoy
James Paschal
D: 2019-03-28
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Paschal, James
Clair Hesseltine
B: 1936-08-20
D: 2019-03-27
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Hesseltine, Clair
Edward Hobbs
B: 1935-12-08
D: 2019-03-13
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Hobbs, Edward
Robert Sibley
B: 1926-10-23
D: 2019-03-10
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Sibley, Robert
Russell Smith
B: 1938-08-02
D: 2019-03-05
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Smith, Russell

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Bangor, ME
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Seeking Guidance: Grief Counseling

The 1969 publication of what was to become a landmark book, On Death and Dying, written by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross changed the way we looked at grief. She described five stage of grieving: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance–stages which became the foundation of our understanding of the experience of grief for decades.

But later research has shown that we cope with grief not in linear or cyclical stages, but in a back-and-forth process which moves between the experience of sadness, anger, yearning, or crying; and the experience of feeling joy or contentment. This is almost a “safety valve”, giving the bereaved a period of rest in dealing with their grief.

Grief is, you see, work. And it seems the body intuitively knows that such hard work requires periods of rest.  This natural back-and-forth process helps us to achieve the four essential tasks in grieving:

1. To accept the reality of the loss

2. To work through to the pain of grief

3. To adjust to an environment in which the deceased is missing

4. To emotionally relocate the deceased and move on with life

But what if you get stuck? Perhaps you can’t accept this new reality; or maybe working through the pain of grief is wearing you down. That’s when a qualified grief counselor can help.

We are pleased to provide bereavement services for the families we serve. In addition, we have many community-based resources we can recommend to you. For more information, please feel free to ask us at the funeral home, or contact us here.